Don't Judge Me: My 'Before' Reorganizing Story

Okay, blogger friends, I have been in full-on, Pinterest inspired, reorganization mode, lately.  But, before I can blog about it and before you see the 'before' pictures, I say...don't judge me, please!

A.  I was not born with my mother's natural organizing skills.  It has always been, and still is, a struggle for me to stay organized.  I don't know why.

B.  Some of the 'before' picture areas weren't always THAT bad.  I did try.  But, here's what happened...

     1.  Pregnancy.  Yep, in late summer of 2010 and at 38 years of age, I found out we were expecting our third child...Sunshine.  And for me, that means 6months minimum of at least a moderate-not mild-moderate level of all-day-long morning sickness.  This round had the extra perks of a constant headache, often turning into an immobilizing migraine.  Somewhere around the 34 or 35 week point, I was put on bed rest because of early labor contractions.  You better believe no organizing happened during that whole time.

This was all I was allowed to do at Sweet Pea's birthday party.

     2.  In my 9th month of pregnancy, about 2 or 3 days after I was taken off of bed rest of course, I broke my ankle.  I stepped off of our back deck.  But, that's not how it broke.  I took a couple of steps on flat yard and my right ankle just twisted, breaking a chip of a bone.  (This really isn't surprising to people who know me, lol.)  Thankfully, it was a clean break in a place that would heal itself in time and didn't require anything other than me using a walker for a couple of weeks and wearing a boot for a little while.  Nevertheless, it hurt, bad.  All the extra, unbalanced, weight did NOT help.  No organizing happened.                                                     

For Easter, I decorated the walker with bows...oh, yes I did! 

     3.  After little Sunshine was born in late April 2011, I had increasing pain in my left knee and it kept trying to pop out of place.  It had been hurting for a while, but when I fell, obviously my left leg overcompensated a lot to make up for the weak left ankle.  I think that just caused further damage in my knee, which resulted in surgery that October and physical therapy for several weeks after that.  You guessed it...still no organizing.

Sunshine on her birth day. 

     4.  But, the last reason is why I think my house just stayed unorganized and got worse over time.  After Sunshine was born and the newness wore off, I really just didn't care about anything.  I continued to homeschool and care for my children, but all I wanted to do was...nothing, except maybe sleep.  Or, cry.  I wanted to cry and did quite often.  I had no idea why I felt that way and often wanted to escape.  I kept telling my husband that maybe if I just went away for a weekend all by myself, that would help me.  But, with three children, one being a baby, that didn't happen. This went on for months.  Through the surgery, through Christmas, and deep into 2012.  I put up a good front, or at least I tried.  Facebook posts were positive and funny, and I think I even got some blogging done.  But, on the inside, I was really bothered by the whole thing.  It just wasn't me.  Somewhere around April or May of this year, I finally called my ob/gyn and scheduled a regular checkup and planned to talk to her about this, but the earliest appointment I could get was at least 3 months away in August.  But, somewhere in the middle of that waiting, (and doing a lot of praying), I read an article about someone's experience with post-partum depression.  Ding, ding, ding!!!  Finally, everything made sense.  I had never experienced post-partum depression before, and I don't suffer from depression in general, so I really had no idea what was going on with me until that moment.  And, honestly, it was like a heavy burden suddenly lifted.  The depression didn't leave immediately, but either it was about to end naturally, or just realizing what was going on caused it to fade away.  (Or maybe both?)  Of course, by the time I was ready and willing to care for myself and my house again, which was just in the past month, it was a wreck!!!!  (Yes, 2 years of almost no organizing activity!)  And of course, non-naturally organized people have no idea where to start, but Pinterest helped with that. 

So, when you see some of the pictures I managed to remember to take in the 'before' stages, I say...don't judge me, please.  Just look at the 'after' and realize how much I'm smiling now. 

God bless!